This is just weird enough to catch my attention. I'm not a wrestling fan by any stretch of the imagination, but I know enough people who sincerely enjoy watching it that I recognized this guy's name and was shocked when I read the story.
WWE wrestler Chris Benoit, his wife, and son were found dead Monday and police said they were investigating the deaths as a murder-suicide….
The station said that investigators believe the 40-year-old Benoit killed his wife, Nancy, and 7-year-old son, Daniel, over the weekend, then himself on Monday….
I know I'm a morbid type, but I can't stop imagining that situation: he killed his wife and child, then waited a day or so before offing himself. What could possibly be going through a man's mind?
Then again, what could possibly be going through the mind of a man paid to grope other men in public? While wearing tights?
I don't mean that to make light of this—three people are dead in what appears to be a fit of ghoulish and curiously domestic violence. Honestly, though, I don't even understand why the man did what he did while he was alive and in public and on the job; how could I possibly understand why he did what he did when shut off from the world in his private home?
For that matter, what hope do I—or any of us, I fear—have of understanding anything anybody does? Even celebrities, who by definition are people living their lives in the public eye, turn out to be enigmas; and murderous enigmas at that. Does that say something about all of us? All of humanity? What the fuck does it say?
In lighter, slightly less enigmatic, news, I've found a really horrible movie to love: DOA: Dead or Alive.
Now, for those of you who aren't total, utter dorks, "Dead or Alive" is a video-game. It's a 3-D fighter that's appeared, in various incarnations, on the Dreamcast, the Playstation 2, the XBOX and XBOX 360. It's not a particularly good fighter, honestly, but because it well lends itself to a rather random play-style (called "button-mashing" by those unenlightened purists who refuse to embrace a sense of randomness in life) I am pretty good at it.
No, "Dead or Alive" really has only two claims to fame:
- It's graphics are top notch―truly, even detractors have to admit that it's just gorgeous eye-candy;
- So are the female characters.
Just in case you have any doubts about that, here's Hitomi:
And this is Kasumi:
So, "Dead or Alive" is a game populated by animated women so curvaceous they make Lara Croft look like she's wearing a sports-bra and boasts a mediocre control scheme at which I excel.
Need I tell you that I love it? Need I explain why?
I know you're asking yourself "How well does this translate to a movie?" right? The long answer is that you've got a laughable plot interspersed by chop-socky action sequences and, no shit, a beach volleyball match…
…all of which features B- and C-list actresses in C- and D-cup bikinis.
The short answer is that the movie is hilarious. Best. B-movie. Ever.
Provided you like watching attractive women bloodlessly beat each other up, whilst bouncing.
Which I guess is something I like to do.
Who knew?
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